Thursday, October 1, 2009

One Down

So the first full day. Without Z. It pretty much sucked, but we made it. His flight left Philly yesterday evening. Thank God, my sister came down to stay with me and help with the kids, because I really needed it. We made some food for the week and gossiped about our other sister, but even that juicy bit still didn't make me feel better. And J, you know that it must be pretty bad when other people's unpleasantness doesn't cheer me up!
She stayed overnight and helped me get the babies ready in the morning. The kids were very well behaved and I was able to take a shower at 5:45 and get myself ready before we rescued them. The biggest reason I'm grateful she came was that the house just went on the market and my realtors were coming in the morning to take pictures and have a tour with the other realtors in the firm. At least I assume it's a firm. Club? Anyway, there was some last minute clutter to clean up before I left for work.
So here is where I'm always surprised by my emotions and when they can dissolve me just when I'm not paying attention. I cried in the car all the way to the baby sitter. This only shook me because I thought that the time I would be the most susceptible would be at home and at night (this is still true, I'm at home, it's night, there's wine, and I'm using blogger as therapy), not on my way to work, a place I thought (haha!) I would be safe. It didn't taper off so after I dropped the twins off I pulled out the big guns. Tori Amos. She may hate men but I'll take her sarcasm over Alanis' rage any day. Luckily I had pulled out Little Earthquakes earlier this week, probably subconsciously preparing.
So the day was difficult but I was relieved when I finally heard from Z after lunch. His flight into Mocow had been delayed and he ended up having to purchase a cell phone so he could call. He is fine, staying with his sister and heading out to the Kaluga region tomorrow. This is about two hours southwest of Moscow.
Another pleasant surprise was that my realtor called and said that two people were interested in seeing the house tonight. There was already someone booked for 7-8, but now two MORE people made appointments. I am hopeful that there is an offer, it would be wonderful to get the house sold quickly. So my babysitter and her father were wonderful enought to let us stay there and have some pizza. While we were there I happened to see the molars that have erupted on Alex's left lower side. He has been so FUSSY and tantrumy that I was beginning to think we had turned the corner on "sweet little boy" and were heading down "satan's minion" lane. I don't know how long this will last but at least I have a label. We got home at 8:30, just in time for a bottle, pajamas, Goodnight Moon (no tears this time!) and bed.
Not every day will be so easy, but I'll have to take them one at a time. If I learned anything from my maternity leave, it's that I MUST let people in and share what I'm going through, and let my friends help. Otherwise I'll be lost.

1 comment:

Sister J said...

That's the way it is though...I always find I cry at the most inappropriate times. Lately it's been while I'm sitting at my desk at work, or when I walk in the door and catch the first glimpse of my daughter who has decided she doesn't want to live with her mother anymore. Not when I'm totally alone in the shower or driving down the 10 lane freeway on my way to work...go figure.